Why is the concept of love marriage/ Dating culture disapproved by most Indian parents?
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Marriage is known as a social institution for a reason.
Love marriage often lacks certain rationalism which is otherwise carefully taken care of in arranged marriages. This very lacking leads to disapproval of parents.
Marriage means a relationship between two families and not just two individuals. If any person wants to keep even at least a functional relationship with their family after marriage, they need to marry a person who is more or less compatible with the family.
Arrange marriage tries to increase the probability of this compatibility by simply making sure the following things –
Finding a bride/groom
These things will clearly ensure that friction between the two parties is least.
Although, these don’t account for the mentality of that individual or the amount of care and respect they would offer. That’s where love marriages have an upper hand.
But in love marriages more often than not, people check their own compatibility with the partner but forget to account for compatibility with family and expect for blind acceptance.
Also, often people can be irrational in love, forgetting to account for the fact that their partner is not just going to be their companion for life but also someone with whom they will raise their kids.
Lack of these considerations lead to friction between the family and the partner in future which further turn into disapproval by family for love marriages.
As an anthropologist, I find this question very interesting. Tylor defined culture as “the complex whole which includes knowledge, belief, art, law, morals, custom, and any other capabilities acquired by man as a member of society.” This definition helps us understand that culture is nurtured, learned over time, and carried with us wherever we go.
For example, an Indian girl working as a doctor in the US might still practice certain cultural rituals from India. Culture is dynamic, constantly evolving, yet some traditions have been followed for generations and require time to change. One such enduring tradition is the caste system. Initially, the caste system was strictly enforced, with lower caste individuals facing severe restrictions, such as being barred from entering temples. Over time, society has gradually begun to accept and normalize friendships across different castes, but this shift has taken many years.
Our parents and grandparents come from a generation that still adheres to the caste system in marriages. They view dating and love marriage as alien to our culture, often due to societal pressures rather than personal beliefs. Deep down, they know that these customs may be outdated, but they continue to uphold them to avoid social disapproval. Ultimately, parents want their children to be happy, and societal change is a gradual process that requires patience and time.
There are a few key reasons why the concept of love marriage and dating culture is often disapproved of by many traditional Indian parents:
There are a few key reasons why the concept of love marriage and dating culture is often disapproved of by many traditional Indian parents:
The culture of dating and love marriage is still disapproved by a vast majority of our Indian society. This notion dates back since generations.
This has been happening due to a lot of factors
The concept of love marriage and dating culture is often disapproved by many Indian parents due to several cultural, social, and traditional factors:
1. Cultural Norms: Traditional arranged marriages have been the norm in India, where parents play a crucial role in selecting a spouse, ensuring compatibility and family background.
2. Family Honor: Marriages are seen as alliances between families rather than just individuals. Love marriages may not align with the family’s social standing, caste, or religion, affecting family honor and social reputation.
3. Caste and Community: Strong preferences for maintaining caste and community purity often lead parents to disapprove of love marriages that cross these boundaries.
4. Societal Pressure: Society exerts pressure on families to conform to traditional practices. Parents fear social ostracism if their children opt for love marriages.
5. Perceived Stability: Arranged marriages are perceived as more stable due to thorough vetting and familial support, whereas love marriages are seen as driven by emotions, potentially lacking long-term compatibility.
6. Control and Authority: Parents may feel a loss of control and authority in their children’s lives, fearing that dating and love marriages undermine their guidance and traditional values.
7. Moral and Ethical Concerns: Dating culture is often viewed as contrary to traditional Indian values, raising concerns about premarital relationships and perceived moral decline.
These factors collectively contribute to the disapproval of love marriages and dating culture by many Indian parents.
Due in large part to deeply rooted traditional and cultural norms, many Indian parents disapprove of the dating and love marriage cultures. In Indian culture, arranged marriages have long been the norm, with families having a major say in choosing a mate based on social standing, caste, and familial history. This conventional method is thought to guarantee compatibility and uphold family honor. Contrarily, love marriages may be seen as a break from these customs, which raises questions about possible threats to the stability and reputation of the family. Furthermore, there may be opposition to intercaste or interreligious relationships because of worries about religious and cultural disputes. Another factor is generational differences, since older generations might find it difficult to embrace contemporary ideas about dating and relationships. All of these elements combined
Due in large part to deeply rooted traditional and cultural norms, many Indian parents disapprove of the dating and love marriage cultures. In Indian culture, arranged marriages have long been the norm, with families having a major say in choosing a mate based on social standing, caste, and familial history. This conventional method is thought to guarantee compatibility and uphold family honor. Contrarily, love marriages may be seen as a break from these customs, which raises questions about possible threats to the stability and reputation of the family. Furthermore, there may be opposition to intercaste or interreligious relationships because of worries about religious and cultural disputes. Another factor is generational differences, since older generations might find it difficult to embrace contemporary ideas about dating and relationships. All of these elements combined